Greys anatomy

I like watching Greys Anatomy.I have never liked watching any doctor-ish tv series.But this one is an exception. Its like watching The O.C on a hospital set.Theres soo much dramas going on: the conflicts, affairs, relationship problems, life struggle etc etc while at the same time trying to save a patients life.. Cant wait to see where the friendship between Izie and Alex will lead to :)
Anyways, this next info is irrelevant to todays entry:

Currently on heavy rotation:
Some kind of wonderful - Joss Stone
Less is more - Joss Stone
Spoiled - Joss Stone
My completeness - Thirsty Merc
Salvame - RBD (a Spanish song)
Cinta - Flop Poppy
Segitiga - Cokelat
Super duper love - Joss Stone (again...)

Gonna have a long and tiring day today.
Have a good Tuesday everyone!

lalalala

uninspired ..
facing a major writer's block..well im not exactly tht kinda writer.. just an insigfinicant writer of my own thesis. it requires time, concentration and peace to write beautifully.. i mean for my thesis, of course..to write crap, anytime also caaan.. when you have sufficient time, you can put yourself in deep thought, keep yourself calm and focus more and pinpoint even the tiny little flaws that are not visible before this.. tinggal conclusion je....conclusionnnnn jee...please laaa.....

anyhoouu..had iftar at the musolla today. It was a fiesta of good food.Seriously.As the iftar was organized by MSAUQ sisters,so,most of the food,I think,was of middle east cuisine.Fave dish would be the lagsania.Super rich with fresh meat, veges and top off with a very creamy cheese layer.Sedap, mantap mengamuks! Other dishes were equally good as well.Didnt know their names.Tapi mmg sedap.Most of them had meat in it.The pasta, the Turkish wrap,the homemade pizzas,the gulai (yg nih mmg tak tau ape name die) and even the bread had it.I dont even like to eat read meat.But I allow myself for an exception today.And yeah,right now Im feeling slightly meat-ish.And oh,Pinna Cotta(did I get the spelling right?) yang Nadia jual kat pasar ramadhan tuh sedap aah..Yum!

mr sun is finally here..
:)

jauh di mata dekat di hati



they said absence makes the heart goes fonder..
oo really..??
well in your case Anina,SANGATLAH BETUL!!! haha.. (dammit,I have to admit that I actually miss you. Quoted somewhere in Mid-Jan, 2005, Petrosains :"Alaaa..Tak cool la kene ngaku miss miss orang nih"..I know Iknow..I take that back)
Your absence definitely makes my heart goes fonder!! (Cheewaah..I bet if u read this,memang dah gelak berguling-guling)
See,how strong your impact on me? (Isyh..isyh..Baaaad Anina)
Out of the blue,I was reminded of your 'Kegilaan'. Hehehe..
No one could sing that T-rex (this is the huge dinasour statue in Petrosains) song tuh hari-hari kat Petrosains plus the act as well..Cam dinaso!!! ("Hey kawan-kawan..Selamat dtg ke dunia ku...lalala..")
Or the time when we were caught red-handed dancing a.k.a berlakon buat video clip Relaku Pujuk on the surveillance camera in Discovery Station..
Or the time we were so immersed in updating with each other's gossips as if we have entered a different world (hoo..tak tipu..bercerite ngan makcik nih mmg tak ingat sekeliling dah..Gossip-monger!! )

Anyways Miss Anina, I would like to wish you a very happy belated 2xth birthday! May God bless you always..

there, there Najwa..shhh...

When you cannot find solace in things that usually cheer you up,
When you fail to get the encouragement that you need to motivate you ,
The best you can do is to find the strength in you by whatever means and keep going..

Bulan puasa ni banyak-banyak kan la amal ye Najwa. Semoga ditenangkan hati dan dikuatkan kesabaran...Aminn..
Takde pekdah nye rase down and complain-complain nih..

super duper love

Yeh are you diggin on me
Yeh yeh yeh
Im diggin on u now baby
Yeh do u wanna little bit of my love
Yeh wait a minute wait a minute

All the time i knew that you loved me
Because you were always there
Could i be that mistaken
Believing that you really care

In the presence of all my friends
You stood there holding my hand
And you promise me faithfully
That you will be my only man

Yeh are you diggin on me
Yeh yeh yeh
Im diggin on u now baby
Yeh do u wanna little bit of my love
Yeh wait a minute wait a minute

Everytime i walk down the street with you
Im as proud as a girl can be
Just to know that u r mine

In the presence of all my friends
You stood there holding my hand
And you promise me faithfully
That you will be my only man

Yeh are you diggin on me
Yeh yeh yeh
Im diggin on u now baby
Yeh do u wanna little bit of my love
Yeh wait a minute your love is super oh baby
See im trying to tell you
Your love is super duper
Super yes it is yes it is

Your love is
Your love is super
Are you diggin on me coz im diggin on you
Im just trying to tell you
Oh this love is super duper
Wait a minute
And all that good loving belongs to me

***
yeh yeh..im diggin on Joss Stone.
and yeh yeh..im super duper mentally exhausted..

(oi , are you diggin on me?)

because im a strong girl

motivator(s)

• 90% for TMAN 3001 Virotec essay
• 90% for Advanced Human Computer Interaction seminar (talking about bridges can be fun and satisfying..in a way)
• good progress in statistical analysis on SPSS (I soooo owe you Mark! Thanks zillionss..)
• managed to pull off the HCI progress report in the most effective way possible (Thanks for sticking with me all day long for 3 consecutive days)
• got an email saying: "calm down...buat keje slow2....insyallah boleh nye........ingattt!!!!!!!!!!!be strong...cz i know u are!!!! " (in the exact copy and paste form)Yeahh..I know..simple words je..But then in times like these (time aku tgh bengong), they are really really helpful.
• my supervisors amazement at my in-depth knowledge on statistical analysis (Lazaros..your da man!! ahahaha..)

Major demotivator(s):

• Could not go back to sleep after unintentionally waking up at 6 this morning. Slept at nearly 4. memangla tak cukup tido..Nyesal giler bangun.. Nyesal.Nyesal.Nyesal.Takde pekdah langsung.Lagi bertambah cranky ade laa..
• Yesterday i was all cranky. Mission to find a goddamn good listener to listen me,yapping on and on about how tragic my day was not accomplished. Ended up calling a dear friend of mine at a very odd hour.Eventhough your so far away but thanks giler aah! (Kau la satu-satunye harapan time time-time camnih)
• Still couldnt get the Metamodel concept into my head
• Mom suddenly had quite a serious bleeding from the previous accident.I was really overcome with panic and fear. Takut giler.Serious..(That explains why I was all cranky yesterday)
• I am still cranky today :(

I want to be happy cam kat atas tuh..

whining part I

Cam nak ternangis sebab penat sangat berlari ke sana sini hari ni kat uni (waah..they rhyme!)under the very hot hot sun.Plus,tak reti nak buat assignment Metamodel.Groupmate pon clueless.Went to see Bob Colomb for consultation.Funny thing is I could understand what he was saying during consultation time BUT when tried to map out the metamodel tak boleh laa pulak.I think I got the concept right..ke aku terdistract tgk his white beard yg sgt byk tuh sampai ter mis understand..Isk isk.. Pastuh sakit belakang semacam.Cam org tua la pulak sakit tulang.Aku perlukan whole body massage! Argghhhhh..Bengong + bongek laa camnih.. Ni yang homesick nih..

fariq otai

happy birthday dude!



p/s: tetibe terpanggil nak buat entry utk kau sementara hari nih tak habes lagi..hehe..many happy returns!!

unsettled najwa

i have been thinking about some things a lot lately. the thinking didnt took me far. not even the simplest solution. there is a simple way out but... benci nyer!! why laa i wasnt being smart enough to know what i want in the first place? want vs. need. do i know what i really want? kot.. but i dont want what i actually need. but after i got what i want, do i really need it? does it matter? again, typing this issue had already given me a terrible headache. i realized that i am at my most disorganized stage. unmotivated. unsettled. edgy. down. its not the pms. this brings me to the next roadblock. how in the world am i gonna complete the testing? stupid project!
really really not looking forward to going to Sydney this coming holiday. tapi dah bayar... wasnt even planning to go pun initially but then, decided to go at the very last minute.But now, dont feel like going at all.. very very very unsettled najwa indeed.

N.R

The day I got my initials on a necklace:


N: Najwa
R: err..Raduan..?? Hehe..


General knowledge for the day:

• 'cuci mata' = looking at the menu but not ordering.Something like, "Tengok boleh, pegang jangan". Geddit?
• Gimme an E for effort. Repeat after me e-f-f-o-r-t, EFFORT!!
• Untidy is great but dirty is uurrghhh..
• Marty Casey (the guy from RockStar:INXS show) is sexy. Nyiahaha.. Please download/listen to Trees and you will know why.
• PMS is not nearly as bad as everyone says. When your warned in advanced by your girlfriend,you must surely know to:

1. Cut her a bit of slack
2. Be extra attentive (I mean, EXTRA with a capital E..)
3. Go out

what happened in the past few weeks?

Merdeka nite
Held at UQ. Good performances, okay food, people dressing up = good fun!
"Zapin Zafana" was the dance. Good commitment and the spirit were high that night. Sampai terlucut sampin, ye Wan Sham..Hehe.. Lurveeeee the band! Gambar later!

dreamworld - goldcoast trip
Dreamworld is my favourite theme park among the other parks. Probably because I am not scared of heights or speed and I have strong stomach. Hehe.. Even though it was drizzling that day, we still had fun. Dropped by Surfers Paradise after that just to lepak and breathe in the beautiful scenery di kala mendung and took some piccies. Went to this 1 shop and saw some very cool models of mini cars and bikes. If I had enuff money tht time, memang laa dah lame beli that Ducati.

Presentation
Had one on Thursday. Nervous gila ba** before my turn came. Pelik. Cam laa tak pernah buat before nih. Padahal presentation biase je. Thesis nyer presentation pon lagi besar than this one tapi leh lepak plak. Luckily, my groupmate, Tom sedaya-upaye menenangkan aku yang maybe nampak huru-hara time tuh. Asked me to take a walk with him and made some small talks in order to make me feel at ease. Thanks, dude!

Girls nite in (ok ok,plus the guys as well)
Went to watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Ramai-ramai. Was planning to sleep over at Nadiyas after that. Yela.. Kite merancang tuhan je yg menentukan.. Girls nite in ape nye. Last-last everyone ter lepak kat umah Nadiya. Main yg tulis-tulis kat kertas name org-perbuatan-anggota badan-name orang.. Haha.. Yes, I know it does sound silly. Tapi sumer org layan giler! Pastuh, main mafia-mafia lak. Seronok! This is my favourite "board game"! And then sambung lak citer hantu. Mule la sumer org rase cuak kan.. We were so into the game and seronok sangat that we didnt realized that hari dah terang kat luar..

Musim orang balik Malaysia
Lepas satu, satu orang balik. Ape nih? Why? Whyyyyy?? Memule Bahiah, and then Remi, pastuh Rabbit, Bijan lak and K.Fidah pon nak balik bersalin.. Yela, yela.. Gie la balik sumer orang.. Tinggal kan laa aku sorang-sorang kat sini.

Anyways, here is a picture which is totally irrelevant to my entry today. Reminded me so much of those sweet ol' times when we really had fun.



(l-r: me, kimah and huda)

my teeth and I

I browsed through some pictures just now.Pictures of me, me and my friends, me and you dll..Browsing through pictures is officially my favourite pastime at the moment!As if I got nothing better to do.But then, since that is the only thing that I can do to actually get on with my life peacefully.Buat je laa.Anyways,I noticed sumting while looking at the pictures.In one of the pictures where I had this wide grin onmy face,I noticed that I actually had a quite nice set of teeth.Straight and organized.Perasankah saye? Selamberr...I dont give a damn!!Miahahaha..Thanks to those 4 torturing years of wearing braces.Seb baik paid off..I hate it when I had the braces on.Cam geek!The only thing that keep me going was when I got the chance to choose the colourful rubber to be put on my teeth.Pink, Hijau,Baby blue, warna-warna pelangi..Excited semacam! Haha..Tapi doktor India tuh dengki doh.Sumtimes I dont get the coloured ones.He just gave me the plain ones (warna getah) instead.Dengki!!Dulu,I hated to smile because of the stupid braces.Conscious semacam.Nak tgk gamba2 mase ade braces dulu pon tak lalu.HUDUH!! But now,I can smile from ear to ear.Muahaha..Tunjuk sket hasil 4 thn pakai braces tuh.Hihihi..Tak best doh pakai braces.Nak makan susah.Kene selalu gosok gigi.Takleh makan chewing gum or sugus.Takleh gigit apple directly, kene potong dulu.Takleh makan mende-mende keras.Dahla banyak pantang makan.Selalu kene ulcer mulut lak tuh pasal besi.Tapi I didnt obey all the freaking rules laa kan.Ade sekali tuh braces tercabut sbb kunyah Sugus.Wahaha..Panic for a few minutes.Seb baik ok je pastuh.Tapi kene bebel ngan dentist India tuh (oo..Now I know why didnt get the colourful rubbers)..Esok-esok biler ade anak sendri,and if they have to put on the braces,make sure pakai mase kecik2.Dont be like me.Pakai after high school.And then continue mase kat kolej and uni.Tak best doh!

aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggghh...!!!!!!! part II


just a few hours left before 11.50 pm.

*sob*

crucial to-do-list

• trust my heart
• have faith in myself
• have faith in other things that matter so much
  

As for now, nope, I cant do any of these.
I just hope I can, so that I can stop blabbering, crying before I go to sleep and get on with my life in peace.

i like you

I like you.
I like you a whole lot.
I like you because
When something matters to me,
It matters to you, too.
When you have a good idea,
You tell me first
When I do, I tell you first.
Thats why we make such a great team.

I like you because
When I say something funny, you laugh,
And when Im not my usual self,
You notice right away
And ask me, "Whats wrong?"

You are there for me and Im there for you.
Thats what friends are for.

I like you because - I just do.
When somebody asks me who my best friend is,
I say, "You." And you say, "Me."
And fifty years from now,
We will ll say the same thing.

Thats the way it is and will always be
You can count on it!

I gave this to a dear friend of mine once.
Hey, I really meant it tau. Every single word. You know I am never ever good at saying stuff. For some reasons, I felt that words that usually came out from my mouth are always wrong. They are either spoken at the wrong time, just plain inappropriate, or worse, both. (I sounded quite mean sometimes especially bab nak luah-luah prasan tak best nih).

That is why I always wish that I can be a good conversationalist who will always know what to say. More importantly, being able to express what I think and how I feel in an effective way. Ntah ape problem nye, taktau ah. Nak cakap tak cukup education utk bercakap, mmg tak logic laa kan. Tension tau tak jadik org yg susah nak cakap nih. That is why I need people who can always encourage me to say things that are buried deep in my mind and heart. Bukan susah pun. Alaa.. Macam belajar reflective listening and body language. All those communication skills that you can practice to show that you are really listening to what the other person is saying and show how open and supportive you are towards the other person.

Haa tengok dah menyimpang jauh dah nih. Well, back to the poem above. Yes, I meant it when I gave it to you and I still mean it now. Up to now, you are the only person that I think fit all the description above. Some people just dont get what I said. Funny things lagi laa. You made me feel much appreciated. And thanks for that.

I felt like such a bum for not being able to be there yesterday to celebrate. I know I should. I really hope you had a great time. Being surrounded by good friends AND good food (I earned a bit of credits for that tiramisu!Hehe..)

I just did not expect that your birthday will be celebrated earlier. Because I was planning to do something special for you on your birthday. You know how I like doing all the sweet surprises. Hehe.. Rase amat satisfied melihat orang gembire kerana mendapat kejutan kejutan yang membahagiakan.

What you said a while ago, "Kawan menangis susah nak cari and kawan ketawa senang nak jumpe." Or something like that. I just hope that I am still both. Even though I know that we rarely see and talk to each other due to commitments and stuff but hey, I am always here if you ever need someone to listen to you.

I even feel a bit 'sebak' while writing this. It might be the pms. I do not know for sure. My life is an emotional roller-coaster these past few weeks.

Well, happy birthday and thanks for being you.

serious panic attack

TETIBE GILER RASE TAK SEDAP HATI!!!!!!





get what I mean? Tak sedap, tak sedaaaaap..!!!
HELP!

yang ku mau II

This is a 're-entry' of a previous post.I know some people might puke hearing another one of my rambling that clearly portray my obsession with Mt.Cootha.Cant help it.A heartfelt wish tht I dont know when it will come true.

dont go away

A cold and frosty morning theres not a lot to say
About the things caught in my mind
As the day was dawning your plane flew away
With all the things caught in my mind

And I wanna be there when youre...
Coming down
And I wanna be there when you hit the ground

So dont go away say what you say
But say that you ll stay
Forever and a day...in the time of my life
Cos I need more time yes I need more time
Just to make things right

Damn my situation and the games I have to play
With all the things caught in my mind
Damn my education I cant find the words to say
About all the things caught in my mind
Me and you whats going on?
All we seem to know is how to show
The feelings that are wrong

Remember when I said that songs make it easier to say stuff that are at times,hard to express? Yeap.This one here is another song that did just that..

Dont go away,
Just stay..

aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...!!!!!!!!!!!

a Desperate piece of advice

"Trust is a fragile thing. Once earned, it affords us tremendous freedom. But once trust is lost, it can be impossible to recover. Of course the truth is, we never know who we can trust. Those we are closest to can betray us. And total strangers can come to our rescue. In the end, most people decide to trust only themselves. It really is the simplest way to keep from getting burned."

See, watching Desperate Housewives is not just for mere source of entertainment.I can learn something from it too, at least something that I reckon I can relate to..

whatever will be will be

All of a sudden,I am terribly scared of where the recent uncertainty in my life will lead me next... Hisyhh... I hate this feeling.

B U S Y

s i c k

h.e.a.d.a.c.h.e

c a t a s t r o p h i c



be my remedy?..

Moments that take our breath away

As we get older, it is not the things that we did that we often regret (ok, sometimes laa) but the things that we didnt do. Oleh sebab itu, I like planning things. I know that not everything that I plan will go accordingly. But somehow, when I have got a plan, there is something that I can look forward to. This is what makes life more meaningful. It motivates me whenever I have something planned out. It is not just big plans (I am not sure how you ppl define big) like special dinners/function, go holidaying or even bigger things like future plans ke yang matters.. To me, even small silly things like gi grocery shopping at Coles ke, beli orange-poppy seed muffin kat main refec ke, walking along Brisbane river ke or anythinglaa dah cukup membuatkan hati ini berase gembira dan bersemangat. Barula ade reason nak start a new day. Eventhough these are small and simple things, but they are stuff of life that sometimes we all overlook. Lumrah kehidupan, we will only realize the importance of things or people when they all have been taken away. Biler dah ade depan mate, tak reti reti nak appreciate. Biler dah hilang, barula terhegeh-hegeh nak nyesal. Hence, we must make the most out of every single day. Take notice of ordinary things that we always take for granted. We all have different definition of these things that we called ordinary. Lain orang, lain la expectation nye. Tapi tak salah kalau kite letak sedikit effort utk cube jadi lebih appreciative. Eventhough what you are trying to do might sound silly to other people, tapi biarlah kan. Sometimes, it upsets me when people do not have plans. Not that I am forcing everyone around me to be a strict supper-planner but this go-with-the-flow belief somehow, irritates me. Bukan laa salah taknak plan apepe, biar je ikut flow, bukan tak boleh, boleh.. Tengok situation laa kan. Orang boleh cakap nanti frust or sia-sia je plan, alih-alih tak jadi. Memangla. Sape yg tak tension bile bende yang plan tak jadi. Tapi dari takde effort langsung nak cube, the least we can do is try. I understand that some people have their own reasons for just letting life taking its own toll. Maybe they are afraid of what they plan might actually come true, maybe they are just too scared or just plain lazy. But whatever the reason is, wouldnt it be nicer when you have something to look forward to?

general rambling

Today was good,in general.I had lectures from 10 am till late in the evening.Surprisingly,I felt quite good (for certain things) and displeased, distressed, disppointed, dissatisfied, saddened, whatever you may call it, because of certain things. Well,it was (and still is) only one main thing that I am mad about but I just feel like using plural forms here.

Got my Business Process assignment back.It was sh** disasterous.I got it all wrong.Satu pon tak betol.Sangat-sangatla terase bodoh sekejap dikala itu.Luckily,she said I could resubmit, provided that I do it more carefully this time. (Thank you God!) Lagipun,Shazia IS a nice lecturer.I kinda expected that this will happen.Heh.Then, went to TMAN3001 lecture.I think im gonna really like this course.Why? Besides the assessments are not that hard (I hope), I get to meet Nan,Mapen,Fuad and Fazz during the lecture.Never in my life I have this many melayu Malaysians (yang kenal rapat..kan korang kan..?) in my class.So,best la.After lect, went to main refec wif Nan and Mapen. Had lunch and spent the noon borak-borak.Dah lame la gak tak borang lame camnih esp about stuff yg tak selalu diborakkan :)

I think most people will notice the 'green' students around uni within this week.Students International House yg dok promote Soiree diorang.Best gak Soiree.International food (but tak sume leh makan) and International cultural performances.The presence of 'orang-orang hijau' tuh somehow managed to light up the UQ environment a bit.Colourful.EKKA pun dah start.Nak gie ke haa? Dunno laa.. Went there last year.God knows how much I spent.Tapi best gak if pegi lagi.As long as I have got good company to go with.

Aarghh..dah banyak cerite bende-bende best yang happened today,I still feel displeased, distressed, disppointed, dissatisfied, saddened (whatever you may call it).Bongek.Bongek.Bongek. Sabar sabar. 1,2,3....Fooh.... Bosan siy**!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyways,I am really looking forward to this wekend (with/without EKKA or Soiree).At least,I have something special and beneficial to do.Yay!!

Are things getting more and more complicated or is it just me who is becoming less intelligent?

I am taking a subject which requires me to investigate/study/analyze Brisbanes Green Bridge project which will link Dutton Park and UQ. (Find more info about it here.)

From its name, clearly I have to spend this whole semester studying about bridge. Fun stuff, I would say, to get the chance to let my so-called creativity to think of questions like; what are the devices that can be added to make the bridge more appealing? What sort of facilities can attract more people to use it and at the same time saves energy?

My groupmates and I had several discussions on how to make the bridge use sustainable energy so that it is environmental friendly. Some of our ideas included monkey bars for those who have strong arms (but what about the old citizens?), slingshot that basically will shoot people to the other side (target location can change: must put safety net around the bridge), treadmills for pedestrians to cross the river to the other end, rats/chimps on treadmills instead of humans etc etc etc. If only my brain cells can allow me to think beyond my normal level of thinking. I need to be more creative here! I remembered that when I was in high school we had this mind-mapping thing before starting an essay. I loved that at that time coz I always got some ideas and good solutions to answer the essay. The question must be much easier back then but still, I could generate my own ideas. But now, I find a bit hard to do that. Too much msg in food kot..otak pun agak lembap laa…

i think im paranoid*
*someone who exhibits extreme and irrational fear or distrust of others

You can look, but you cant touch
I dont think I like you much
Heaven knows what a girl can do
Heaven knows what youve got to prove

I think Im paranoid
And complicated
I think I'm paranoid
Manipulate it

Bend me, break me
Anyway you need me
All I want is you
Bend me, break me
Breaking down is easy
All I want is you
I fall down just to give you a thrill
Prop me up with another pill
If I should fail, if I should fold
I nailed my faith to the sticking pole

I think Im paranoid
Manipulate it
I think Im paranoid
And complicated

Paranoid I think Im paranoid

Steal me, deal me, anyway you heal me
Maim me, tame me, you can never change me
Love me, like me, come ahead and fight me
Please me, tease me, go ahead and leave me
Bend me
Break me
Anyway you need me
As long as I want you baby it's all right

Bend me break me
Any way you need me
As long as I want you baby it's all right

paranoids love Garbage!

nothing intriguing crossed my mind

hence this picture..



giler cool aah rambut die!!


(will ban Brisbane school of hairdressing for a while)

wishy wish

There are so many things that I wish I could be.For example,I wish I was more outgoing and outspoken so that I could talk to anyone and befriend more people. I also wish I was more emotionally detached so that I could stop being so sensitive coz it made me feel so vulnerable and helpless and bloated with feelings of guilt sometimes.I wish I was funny and witty so that I could say all the clever things and make people laugh.I wish I had a stronger mind so that I could for once ignore what other people would think and say about me.I wish I was a better mind-reader so that I would know the things to do satisfy and make other people happy. I wish I was less selfish and be a more giving person.I wish I was more optimistic so that I could worry less, loosen up a bit and enjoy the many things that life could offer.I wish I could have more fun without thinking about the consequences later.I wish I was more spontaneious, fun and entertaining.I wish I was slimmer.I wish I have longer, shapely legs (Haha). I wish I... I wish, I wish, I wish...

aku dah bosan!

tak sabanye nak tunggu grad ujong tahun nih
tak sabanye nak balik Malaysia balik
tak sabanye nak tunggu umur 26 tahun
tak sabanye nak pindah rumah baru
tak sabanye nak belaja bawak keta and of course, ade keta sendri
tak sabanye nak duduk sendri
tak sabanye nak... macam-macam aah..

seberapa pantas

assalamualaikum and hello!
im back in Brissy.Safely touched the ground of Queensland and breathed in the winter air last Monday,11th. Holiday terpakse dipendekkan.Was supposed to be an ultimate holidayer till 21st July. Cam baru je semalam sampai KL. Just 10 days. Nak makan goreng pisang pun tak sempat!Anyways, during my short time in Msia, I managed to kerja for 3 days at Petrosains..Hehe..Best! Sebab kat situ boleh laa nak catch up ngan rakan-rakan,tukar-tukar gossip dan sebagainye.I was soo lucky that K.Anina,Mujtahid,Syafiq,Arrifin, Farah and Huzaifah were still there. Its still the same science centre. Same routine and almost the same people.Some I was most delighted to see and some..well,lets just say, I just culdnt stand the sight of them.

And also, I met up with Kimah!! Kimah dearie..By any chance if your reading this,I am truly sorry for not being able to stay longer.sigh.Kena balik cepat.Lucky I went to see you that day.At least boleh tanya2 khabar, even for a short while.Next time I promise I will make myself available for you to belanja kayh!! Muahhh!!

Quite sad gak this time mase nak balik that day kat KLIA.My mom just dropped me off.Kesian dia tak larat nak send me off properly because of her still recovering legs.She can only walk with crutches and if nak gi grocery shopping ke (cam hari tuh) must use wheelchair. Luckily she can already drive.Yay! I know I should be driving her but then takleh nak wat camne kan.. Ni pun dah cukup rase miserable yang amatlah sangat.Sigh.I just cant imagine how my younger sist and bro and of course of my dad, took care of her needs for the last few months.Mase baru-baru lagi accident,she was still very very weak.Memang kena jaga dgn serba teliti nye.Nak gi toilet,nak mandi,nak makan etc etc.. Itah and Aiman,thanks yah.. Even for that short while I was at home,I did what I could to help her.Time-time camnilah kite kene jage mak kite..Baru lah rase camne susahnye mak kite jage kite mase kite kecik-kecik dulu.Ni baru sorang je mak.Kalau mak yang ada ramai anak tuh tak dapatlah nak bayangkan camne.

IFRAN!!
Oitz!! Alaaaaaaaaa..Your not in Brisbane anymore. SOB! We are so gonna miss you here. I am pretty sure skarang nih,kalau bunyi jarum jatuh pun boleh dengar kot kat unit 4 tuh. No more 'melalak' session. Aman dan damai lah Richard and Bernadette kerane unit 4 tidak akan bising seperti dulu lagi. Haha.. Tapi tak bestlaa kau takde..Serius!
Thank you for all your advices, jokes,MJ walk,openness,air coklat yg best, teman aku mase aku tgh boring and depressed etc etc..Banyak giler kalau nak list out kan semua. And sorry for everyting jugak.Tak sempat nak hang out pun mase balik that day.What happened to our plan of going to a mamak stall in Gombak yang ade salsa dancers tuh?Hehe..Next time tau..

rentetan peristiwa

Several meaningful happenings in the past few weeks which I wanted to post but didnt due to my 'endless hectic life'. Plus, I will be away for 3 weeks and might not be posting anything interesting.(at the time of this entry is typed,I am already in KL)..
And just in case, if anyone misses me during my absence, you people can always have a sneak at the piccies here..Haha..

Rollerblading bersama rakan-rakan




my 22nd birthday


Home-made pizzas + cheesecake: Effort by those yg concern and really care tht I have a very happy 22nd..


himpunan hadiah-hadiah. Many many thanks!

Also not in the picture: Birthday smses + wishes + calls esp frm yg jauh2 di sana, sling bag frm me familia and birthday cards.. T H A N K S!


memorable outings..

point to ponder

All of a sudden, I think I am being unreasonable and a bit selfish that I scare myself..
Is it because I expect too much or things are just being the way they are and I am the one who needs to get used to it? Entah laa..



Btw, I have added some more links (some websites + frens blogs). This should be done waaaay earlier but sori ye rakan2, saye seorang yang pelupe :)

life after exam pt.II

Semuanya bermula di sini..


My oriental clutch bag and a mug of hot choc were witnesses to what happened on the night of our outing to The 3 Monkeys


Everyone seems normal before the abduction..


Hear no evil, speak no evil, see no evil


Sambungan of the no-evil-fellowship..Miahaha!


Waiting to be abducted by a spaceship..


After the abduction: Everyone got superpowers..



Disclaimer: The pictures above are moments captured on the girls nite out. Probably the aftermath upon finishing exams. Kazzilions of apologies if you are emotionally distressed by them :)

life after exam

It has been quite some time since the last time we had a girls nite out. So, we had one yesterday. Ramai-ramai (not really ramai la, satu keta je) went to everyones favourite hang-out place, 3 Monkeys. We ordered Hot Mocha, Muguccino (tol ak spelling Rabs?), Hot Choc and Iced Choc as well as some cakes. Raspberry White Chocolate Cheesecake and Chocolate Mud Cake. Sedap sangat-sangat. Tgh type nih pon terliur lagi. Ehehe.. I even tapau a slice of that Raspberry cake. Punye laa sedap..Nak suruh org lain rase jugak betape yummy nye cake tu.. And then, we had a session of 'gigam'. Macam2 posing adaa.. We noticed that the 2 guys sitting next to our table trying hard not to laugh watching us yg kejap dok seblah sane, pastuh kat sini plak, tarik kerusi laa, cube buat muke 'savvy'.. Hahaha.. We were clearly making ourselves at home. Adegan 'gigam' tidak berhenti di situ sahaja. On our way back, we stopped by the UFO-thing which is just next to 3 Monkeys. Amik gamba kat situ pulak. Kereta2 yg stop kat traffic lights tuh sure ingat kitorg tgh ade ritual pemujaan ke or jakun nye minah-minah nih.. Lantak laa kan.. Bukan selalu. Haha..Will letak several piccies later. Mak called just now. They were on their way to Muadzam, Pahang to send my younger sist off to Uniten. She will be doing pre-u in Accountancy. Hehe.. Soo not in the plan.. Takpela Itah.. Tu pun kire ok jugak.. All the best! Will visit you there when I go back next week okay! Speaking of going back, counting the days je nih nak balik Malaysia. Tapi have to go through Pet interview dulu.. Urggh.. Takmo! Suddenly, I am not that enthusiastic to balik. Isyhh.. I know I should be happy like, wheeeeeeee..!! Best nye nak balik! Yeah, rite.. Pastuh, sekarang nih rase sangap gler. The girls went to the city just now. I just dont feel like going out. Pastuh boring dok umah. Padan laa muka sendri. Luckily Rabs at home. If not, mmg mati kutu.. Pegi city esok, jom??

take me away




take me away
take me away
Ive got nothing left to say
just take me away
dont give up on me yet
dont forget who I am
I know Im not there yet
but dont let me stay here alone..

saya sudah merdeka!!

Finished my exam last Friday exactly at 10.15 am.Yay! I am officially off the hook. But I still have one more report to complete but it should be ok I reckon :) The first thing that I did after my last exam was heading straight to the city.Best best.Bought some stuff like scented candles and aromatherapic fragrances.In times like these, I love going shopping alone.I dont have to wait for other ppl to choose the top that they want to buy and can spend as long as I want in a shop.Hehe.But there are times when shopping berjemaah adalah sangat-sangat dialu-alukan. And then later in the evening,me,ili,remy,wan,hafiz,nan,amar and ifran went to watch movie at Southbank.Initially, we wanted to watch Mr & Mrs Smith but sold out laa plak.Ended up watching Batman Begins.It was good.For those yg nak tau camne Bruce Wayne boleh jadi Batman(like me),sure rase movie nih worth watching...

Will pick up my flight ticket tomorrow.I cant believe that I am going back this winter break.Have never done this before.A spontanieous decision that I made during Swotvac.I hope I will have fun back home.I just want to relax and unwind.Too many things happened and too much stress.Eventhough I know I will miss Brisbane for 3 weeks(quite badly) but this might just be the getaway that I need.Hehe..

All For Believing
(another brilliant song by Missy Higgins)

Pull back the shield between us, and Ill kiss you
Drop your defenses and come, into my arms

Im all for believing, Im all for believing
Im all for believing if you can reveal the true colours within

I know you blanket your mind so much that I am blind but I,
I see you have painted your soul into your guard
Im all for believing, I'm all for believing

I need to know just how you feel, to comfort you
I need to find the key let me in, into your heart, to find your soul
Pull back the shield between us, and Ill kiss you
Drop your defenses and come, into my arms
Im all for believing, Im all for believing

Im all for believing, if you can reveal, the true colours within
And say you will be there for me to hold

When the faith grows old
And life turns cold
When the faith grows old and life turns cold

So if you are cold I will stay, maybe fate will guide the way
I believe in what I see and baby we were meant to be
Just believe
Just believe
Just believe
Trust in me

--------
I REALLY am all for believing:

I believe that I will pass my INFS4205 exam. (Tolong laa pass..Tolooong laaa..)
I believe that I will do well in MGTS3601 exam.
I believe that I will have tremendous fun in Malaysia when I go back for holiday.
I believe that I will get through my interview easily.
I believe that I will leave a good impression on the interviewers. (Hehe..Sangat2 wish!)
I believe that I will graduate at the end of this year.
I believe that I made the right decision.
I believe in you.

So, help me God.Do not let all the things that I believe in, dissapoint me.

For those who still have exams, Good luck!!

weeeeeee...

In the midst of a critical-tak-cukup-mase-nak-study-for-exam situation, I just wanna say:
tralalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala

:)

sometimes, some songs make it easier to express things that are hard to say..

Im losing you
Im losing all control
Just let me be
Let me be alone for now
I want to be alone tonight

Once and again we ve gone off track
And lost all hope for coming back
It's time to restart again
And try all over again

Its time to work
The work is useless now
Can't you see
Your help is lost to me
I want to be alone tonight

Rooney - Losing all control

chaos

A lot happened this week. Some were good, some were bad. Some were sweet, some were bitter. One thing for sure: I learnt a lot. There were too many things that I wanted to say that it twinged if I didnt just blurt it all out. Its high-time for everyone. SWOTVAC is here! Sumer org pon busy study. Saye juge yg tak start2 lagi. Things just come and go unexpectedly. I am going back to Malaysia this July. Yay!! Yay coz I get to see my beloved family but not-so-yay as I was supposed to do some stuff for my honours project. But it was all worth it. My mom asked me to come home since she wanted to come here but couldnt because of her still-recovering knees. Me and me mom had a very long and deep phone conversation last nite. I dont know why but maybe she could hear the tense in my voice. She then asked me to balik to tenang-tenang kan fikiran. Honestly, I AM fine and calm. Nothing to be worried about. But then, since dah offer suruh balik, balik laa kan.. Hehe..

And then my friend whos studying in the US is going to the DCI Final. Tau enggak apa itu DCI Final? DCI stands for Drum Corps International. Its a major championship where top marching bands compete. I was like,"Aaaaarrrggghhh!Aku nak ikut jugak" when she told me this morning. Band-band hebat seperti Blue Devils, Madison Scouts and of course my favourite; The Cavaliers which I worship since form one, are all going to be there, performing proudly in the open field. I am sure none of these make sense to the general viewers. Sure korang cam, ek elee..Best ke bende-bende ni? But those yg used to be in a marching band or somehow interested in these kinda stuff tau laa kot betape best and hebatnye the bands I mentioned earlier and how supercallifragillicitexpelidocoius-cool nye if I could get the chance to watch them perform live even once. I envy you Wannani!!

The Drumline: smart giler tahap cih-pan!

(Once upon a time, I used to play THAT and did something like wht they did in the pic..I wanted to be back in the band.Obviously I am still-not-over-the-excitement-of-playing-snare phase..Hoho..Weyh,dahlaa..Move on ok!)

as requested



danesz, this ones for u babe! hehe..
cudnt find the "i m not your puppet" pic..

it sure feels like shit and..



.. for that

*I am in dire need of retail theraphy*

the day i turned 22..


i know that we are gonna celebrate my birthday at Pancake Manor's..


but I did not expect THIS!! :)


me, still overwhelmed by what just happened..

Many thanks to everyone who made last night a night not to be forgotten.Heh..Seriously, I am still touched by korang nye sweetness nih.. :) Giler tak larat!! And also thank you for the homemade pizzas, apple pie and cheesecake. I felt soo gemok but happy..Hehe.. Thanks guys. You made my day!!

(Zillion thanks to Ili and Huda for your shoulders and ears.Words can never describe how glad I was to let it all out. Thanks for being there!)

statistical analysis = bengong, muak,bosan,tensi,sakit kepale,confused

Buat kira-kira statistic to analyze questionnaire adalah saaaaaangat memeningkan.

Sesungguhnya,sekarang ini:



adalah...



Sekian, terima kasih.

I want this sooo bad sampai mimpi.

h u g e r e l i e f

The presentation was alright. I was a nervous wreck by the time it was my turn to present. Second person for today. The first person was a Chinese guy with his "Digital Archaeological Library" project. I was relieved when Lazaros came in the room. And was a bit surprised when he came with Sean. But it was a pleasant one though. Hoho. They both were my lecturers last sem. But I didnt like Sean at tht time coz I think he had quite a wicked sense of humour. Very sarcastic and suke kenekan org. Very dry British jokes. And not funny at all. Hoho. But then, I realized he was actually quite nice. Especially when he helped me out with my thesis this sem. A cool guy I would say for his age. I am not sure how old he is (I am pretty sure hes quite old) but I know he listens to all those grunge-alternative-rock music. This one day, I saw his cd collection in his office. There were American Idiot, Absolution, Franz Ferdinand, Blur to name a few and lots of others yg tak ingat dah. Tapi sumer rock bands. Giler banyak cd die. Serius! Cool la Sean.. I also remember last sem when some of us were begging him to extend the submission due date because of Muse nye concert, he was pretty lenient about it. Ntah2 die pon pegi jugak. Hehe.. Anyways, I was really grateful tht Sean did ask me a question tht I can answer during my presentation just now. However, kantoi jugak laa when Lazaros asked me sumting about the reality centre. From where I was standing, I could see Sean smiling sebab dia tau aku kantoi! Adusss.. but then he said it was alrite. Overall performance was good. Yay! Before they both went out, Sean sempat tanye: <I reckon you should help me lecturing next sem> Aha!! Very funny Sean. I take that as a compliment! :p I just managed to put a big smile on my face at tht time. Tak larat nak reply. Dah cukup cuak dah tadi.. Esok gue kene conduct experiment pulak. Sesape yg involved, esok tau, jangan lupe!

thesis seminar presentation : 24 May 2005 [11.40 am , 78 - 622]

The 'cuak'est moment (the one that I have been waiting for but hope it wouldnt come) will come tomorrow.Its either I strut my stuff successfully and wow the audience (esp Lazaros) or screwed up big time. Though I would really looooove to have the former but the latter is just as possible. I sure need all the luck in the world and pray that everything will run as smooth as possible.

some of the trivial things that matter to me

• I am nervous because I have a major presentation coming up this Tuesday.
• I am also nervous because MOCK interview is next weekend but I am happy because this means I get to go to Sydney even for a short while. A weekend getaway from the hectic uni schedule is great.
• I am overjoyed because I can still put on my earrings. Lubang tindik is still ok. Yay!!
• I am eager to have coffee with my favourite Orange-and-Poppy-Seeds Muffin after this. Yum!
• I am delighted because I heard my fave song You and Me (by Lifehouse) on the radio just now when showering.
• I am feeling really fat because this is my fat week and I ate much worse than a tapir.
• I am contented because I expected something happy to happen to me some times this week.
• I am also worried because what I expected might not turn out the way I wanted them to be.
• I am feeling slightly sluggish because of Potret Mistik at 4 am in the morning.
• I am motivated and inspired because I feel my artistic sense urging me to do something creative like designing and painting on a t-shirt.
• I am happy because I am just happy today.

P/S: To those who are wondering what is a tapir, it is the largest of the species and is distinguished by its unusual coloration. The rear half of the body above the legs is white. And it is related to horses and rhinos but not to pigs. And also, 'Potret Mistik' adelah tak mistik langsung ok. How could an old crazy woman (played by Khatijah Tan, she was good but the movie just sux) who might not be exposed to technology and modern appliances (given the fact that she IS crazy and duduk terkurung kat dlm rumah), could possibly reply MMS and drive a car which still looked nice and kinda sporty. Ape? Die sempat pegi hantar workshop utk repair ke?

breathe and stop

we wanted the best of everything without realizing that sometimes these things are not the best things for us after all because we wanted all the wrong things in the first place..

i still have:

• Thesis seminar presentation next Tuesday - crapping for 15 mins and answer questions for 5 mins(in which i think i will probably crap again) :p
• Multimedia and Spatial databases assignment. Worth 30% (Banyak!!) I still couldnt grasp what the lecturer is actually trying to teach us..This guy just graduated with a PHD but still very very young.. And so well-groomed..I am starting to think that he might actually be gay.(Ha!) No offense here to all the well-groomed straight guys out there.I just hope that I am wrong.Heh..
• Special Topic test - I need at least 5 participants for this experiment. Found 3 (insya allah) and need 2 more.. Jom korang! This should be fun..
• Special Topic Report - As usual, must do this after the experiment.This one should be okay I reckon
• Mock Interview - On the 28th May.Baru je pk nak dok umah diam2 that weekend..One word: c u a k! Reminding me that the real interview is just around the corner.Huhu..

will this sense of loss fade?

It was sunny in the morning and really rainy in the evening. Just like how I felt today. Very the cheery and happy in the morning and semakin mandom and terus kusam bila petang menjelang sampaila malam. Feelings I dont like but will somehow try to tolerate. What do I expect? Nak happy je 24/7? I wish!! Everything on this earth surface change ok. Harga minyak, fashion, umur, favourite food, tempat tinggal etc etc and of course people, change. Just like my mood laa. Tinggal lagi my mood is sometimes awfully far worse and much more susceptible to the change in its surrounding tahap takleh nak control if nak compare ngan bende2 lain yg tak stabil jugak. Huh.. Have you ever felt so annoyed at the very sight of someone? Tengok kelibat je,dah aarrrrggghh!! Takmau2.. Teruk kan? Isk isk.. Or sometimes you felt so betrayed or cheated or used (dipergunakan) coz you didn’t get what you want though you have tried play your role the best that you can. *sigh*. And the other party is like <Yey! Look at me, Look at me, Look at what I got!> Enggak fair!!! And there are times when you feel people are being nice to you because they want something from you? Yes, I am being paranoid. And also, I am impatient with things moving too slowly, ok. Tak paham-paham lagi ke?? You think I got all the time in this world, izzit?? You must be crazy.. or just plain lembab. Yes, I know change is important. It helps you grow and be a better person. There is even a course teaching UQ students about change in organizations and how to manage it (I am taking it this sem). But, I really wish some things never change. Because when they do change, I feel a huge sense of loss and jadik macam ni..

worth waiting for..

The 4th season of Smallville is just great.Not that I have watched the finale but up to the 18th episode,the story just gets better.I know it is such a grand spoiler to all the avid Smallville fans out there tapi nak bagitau jugak!! Hehe..In this episode, finally Clark Kent had the chance of having the last dance with Lana,during their senior prom.Lame tuuu kene tunggu.I have a feeling that they wont end up together this season.And not sure that they will, ever.Its just a hunch though :)

the joined hands, the last dance and the song they last danced to..

What day is it? And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I cant keep up and I can' back down
Ive been losing so much time

Cause its you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I cant keep my eyes off of you

All of the things that I want to say just arent coming out right
Im tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

Cause its you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And its you and me and all of the people
And I dont know why, I cant keep my eyes off of you

Theres something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right

Cause its you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I dont know why, I cant keep my eyes off of you
and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And its you and me and all of the people
And I dont know why, I cant keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive

:: You and me - l i f e h o u s e ::

so, what did you do during the weekend?

I was utterly depressed on Friday night. But it was all paid off when Saturday came. Well, initially I was still a bit miserable when I woke up that morning. We had a gotong-royong, rearranging and reorganizing the surau library. Bapak banyakkk reading materials. And so were the other irrelevant stuff. Ade ke patut simpan kurma and cordial dalam almari which was meant for telekung and sejadah. Isyh isyh.. Bangkai lipas pun ade jugak. Feeling so worn out after the cleaning up and still gloomy I was really reluctant to go to Nadias birthday party. But then when seeing my housemates getting all excited to change and go, I was somehow triggered to go as well. At least takde la layan sedeh sorang-sorang. The party turned out to be great. It was faboluso!! Full of fun, yummy food (nasi tomato and chocolate cheese cake.Hubba hubba!) and wacky camera-poses. And as a result, here are some of the great moments managed to be captured that day.


:: whos that girl? ::
busy at work


::melompat lebih tinggi. Weee!! ::
nadias party - this is just one of the many wacky acts


:: favourite snapshot ::


:: and another one ::
at the bustop,heading home after the party

i cant get over you since the first time i set my eyes on you.. :)

I should be taking my driving lessons by the end of this year when I got back. WAJIP! Baru laa terhegeh-hegeh skarang nih nak amik lesen. Awal-awal dulu taknak amik.Sekarang nyesal.Giler ketinggalan. Tapi bukan tak nak amik before nih. But every time I went back for holidays, I’d be working, which kinda tied me up. How do I fit the driving lessons in between those long-gruelling hours of working?? (Note the exaggeration here) Hohoho..I wasnt that busy pun but then takde motivation nak amik driving lessons aah.. In addition to that, my mom is always willing to offer me a lift and plus, LRT kan ade? Heh.. (Yeah, rite..Macam la selalu gune pun) But then, when someone pointed out, “Tak kesian ke mak awak je kene drive?” (Since my dad doesnt drive, doesnt know how and doesnt want to learn how) Maka, timbul lah rase insaf untuk belajar driving..Lebih2 lagi apabile kejadian kemalangan tempoh hari telah menyebabkan emak saye terlantar di rumah dan tidak boleh memandu untuk satu tempoh yg agak lama (She told me that she was really bored just staying at home with nothing to do and was sooo keen to start driving the car back) Lagipun, boleh belaja saing ngan my bro and sist (as this friend of mine pointed out..again…)Yela2…balik nih belajar driving, ok!

the attack of the NERDs

another entry with less than 20 minutes difference from the previous one...Hehe..Just couldnt wait..


a tribute to our PQSA Trivia..Go group SIX!!!

..Sunday morning rain is falling..Steal some covers share some skin..

Waking up to the stimulating, rich aroma of coffee and starting your day off with the super delicious cheese and bake pasta definitely made you feel good all day long (Thanks Fazz!). What a good start. I usually loathe Sundays coz Monday will come next and there goes my kick-off of a boring and stressful week. But since tomorrow is a holiday everything seems so perfect. At least for now.

On top of all these, getting a new haircut just added to the joyous anticipation of having a good weekend. Along with the good coffee, nice breakfast and new hairdo, it rained yesterday. It was pretty heavy. Just after I got the new haircut. Rain just fits well with the whole dramatic happiness situation. Perfecto!!

A new haircut always helps to make you feel good. Yes. True.. New haircut can be a barometer of how you feel about yourself. Like right now, I feel so happy and I think I can do anything that I want to and experience all the good things that life has to offer. Hohoho.. And, oh, its raining again, outside.... :)

..Come and rest your bones with me.. Driving slow on Sunday morning.. And I never want to leave..

i wish vending machines sell hot food

Yesterday I was working on my assignment in the lab till late in the evening. Due today. So freaking stressed out semalam. The work involved was not a lot but the questions, aiyoo, were so freaking complicated. Me and Maz were cramming our brains trying to answer all of them. Thank God I wasn’t alone taking this subject. If I was, I would be soo screwed up. And yesterday, was also the day all the food stalls went on strike. Sket2, strike. Sket2, rally..Hmmph..I totally forgot about it. So, I ended up eating Arnotts Shapes form the vending machine for lunch. Huhuhu.. Eleee..Macam laa tak biase. Last year was worst. Eating stuff from the vending machine was like a routine. Since, I had to stay back in the ITEE lab, almost everyday for group projects, and plus, I would be too tired too cook when I got back. And thank God, I don’t have any group work this sem and theres Abg Khalid, who makes sure we all get our dinners on time. I just realized something. If anyone wants to know when is the time that the ITEE students are busy with their assignments and stuff, just go and check the vending machines out. Kalau the food inside of it dah tinggal sikit, tu maksudnye tgh peak hour la tu…

a weekend of fun in pink


Inilah housemates saye..(From right: Rabbit, Fazz anad me)
:: In front of the pool before heading to the city to watch the Anzac Parade ::



Birthday girl and I
:: before our glorious transition to pink..Hehe.. ::



Fazz's party after the Anzac Parade. Theme: PINK!
:: Somehow,everyone looked soo radiant in pink ::


even Aerosmith loves pink :)

Pink-its my new obsession,
Pink-its not even a question,
Pink-on the lips of your lover,
cause Pink is the love you discover

Pink-as the bing on your cherry,
Pink-cause you are so very,
Pink-its the color of passion,
cause today it just goes with the fashion

Pink-it was love at first sight,
Pink-when I turn out the light,
Pink-gets me high as a kite,
And I think everything is going to be all right,
No matter what we do...

Yeaahh..embrace the pink!

a special entry for Fazz:

H A P P Y
21 st
B I R T H D A Y!!

semoga panjang umur and murah rezeki selalu :)

stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress !!!!!!!!!!!

warrggggghhhhhhh...!!!!!!!

My Friendster's Horoscope: Today's forecast..

The Bottom Line
You're bouncing off the walls today! Use that energy to charm someone special.

In Detail
For better or worse, someone has captured your attention, totally and completely. You can't remember the last time you felt this way. And there's a good reason for that: You probably haven't ever felt this way. At least, not since becoming an adult. It's called passion, and this wave of it is here for at least the day. What you do with it is up to you, of course, but you can cross arguing off the list right away.

Errkk..?!?! Apekah ini???..

in dire need of going to the lab..please help!

sesape yang:

• nak gi lab ITEE waktu malam
• nak stay overnite kat ITEE lab
• giler rase tak produktif buat keje kat rumah
• and giler rase nak buat keje kat ITEE lab

within this week, sile maklumkan kepada saye,ok...

currently in the makan-cam-tapir phase..aarrgghhh!!!!

those old days...

I browsed through K.Am’s blog today. On of my dearest dormmates in STF 7 years back. She just celebrated her 23rd birthday. So, Happy Belated Birthday to you!! "Buaya makhluk asing Gred A"..Haha.. Sound familiar to you tak K.Am? Hehe.. Though you might forget what that means but I still remember this gelaran very clearly. Hope you had the best birthday ever!

Out of the blue, all the memories of birthday celebrations back in high school are coming back to me. I am not the kind of person who celebrate my birthday before coming to STF. There, birthday celebrations are a tradition. I think it was because we were far away from our families, so in order to avoid from feeling homesick, birthdays were celebrated. The simplest but sweetest way was being waked up at midnight by your dormmates and close friends. And they sang happy birthday to you. And they gave you a birthday card and each and everyone of them would give you a big warm hug. It was really simple. Nothing grand. No cake, no gigantically wrapped presents, no ballons, lampu pun takde, gelap je sebab dah off-lights..Nyanyi pun kena pelan-pelan,takut nanti warden marah.Hehe.. But it was really really sweet. Just when you thought noone remembered your birthday and you were feeling really gloomy about it that you went straight to bed after prep malam, then all of a sudden, at 12 midnite sharp, people gathered around your bed and sang happy birthday. Terharunye..

Among the presents that I got during my 5 years in STF, I wont ever forget this one. It was a huge box full of Twisties. When I said huge, I really meant it. It was really really huge, people. I was in Form 4 and I had this weakness for Twisties (the one in the red wrapper especially and still a big fan up to now) and other sorts of junk food. I could eat only Twisties everyday and skipped the other meals, which wasnt good for my health (I nearly had an eating disorder at that time, but that was a different story). Anyways, I was really touched by the effort made by my friends in searching for the big box and of course the many packets of Twisties to fill up the box. If I was not mistaken, Twisties kat Ko-op tuh habes dibeli oleh rakan2 ku just so that the box was really filled with them. Best gell!! If you are reading this, Nurulakmal Obet, Fado, Neila and several other names that I couldn’t remember, THANK YOU!

Looking back at those birthday memories, I realize how I miss those old days. There are so many things that I miss that I dont know where to begin. I even miss the time when I was caught red-handed mase main-main tekan fire alarm nye emergency button and nearly got smacked for it by the warden on duty.

Now that I am older, birthdays mean a lot more to me. Though its nice to have a gathering, a party or makan-makan with all your friends but in the end, these dont really matter. It isnt about how many presents you are getting but it is about how people that you love and care about show that they really care for you by just being there. Its their thoughtfulness and presence that matter to me the most.

1,2,3 tarik nafas.........hembus.....

For the last 2 or 3 days I have been stroppy, unreasonable and moody.Thousands of appologies to those who were offended by my weird behaviour.I am really really sorry if what I said and did hurt your feelings or menambahkan kerisauan and kepeningan kepala.I didn't mean any of it.Even if I did,I should have done it in a more considerate and tactful way(in which, I still don't know how..) Probably because I am under a great deal of stress and been thinking quite a lot lately (as usual) .Anyways, I'm feeling a bit better now.I think I need to have some more chocolaty things..

Got a call from Azree just now letting me know that March allowance and OSHC sudah di settle kan.Wuhoo!!! Finally...Berjanggut tunggu..Rupe-rupenye they got confused with the names yg kene hantar letter and teroverlooked my name (among the other students' names yg tak dpt jugak..) He appologized and sounded genuinely terrible about it(which was goood and nice to hear).

He checked the amount that I should get and said "So,your OSHC and March allowance should be in by today..Waahh..Banyak jugak you dapat this month.Oshc $xxx plus March allowance $xxx..Kaya laa you sekarang.Bagus jugak ye you tak dapat semua skali that day"(Followed by his gelak2 kecil which I think he was trying nak cover laa tuh..)

Haah,ye la..Sempat ye buat lawak.Tak tau betapa meranenye poket ku last month..

Went to the city just now.Initial intention was to get a nice,long, chunky necklace for myself.But then couldn't find any.Been looking for it over the summer till now.Enggak ketemu lagik.Bagaimana nih?..Huh..Ended up buying some aromatherapy stuff.A nice smelling,green liquid Aroma Spa foam bath.Went in and out of many shops.Seen lots of interesting stuff.Like the apple green cardigan kat Valley Girl, knitted wear, the stripey and checked retro pants kat Tempt, and oh the baby blue velvet blazer kat JayJays..CANTEKK!! i want,i want,iwant!! Too bad allowance tak masuk lagi.If not,you will definitely be mine,you pretty little blazer..Bahiah bought something at VG.Ifran pun shopping gak.Busan la nih..2 more days before uni starts! Didn't do much work.But if you count lepak2,melalak,tgk network movie and main card as work.Then,mmg banyak! Oh well,from my definition of fun I had a seriously good time this Easter Break.Tremendous FUN :)

I:

• am not feeling well (extremely painful sore throat)
• want waffles for breakfast tomorrow
• wanna watch more movies (like The Pacifier,Sepet and Be Cool - again?Yep..)
• wanna enrol in Luis Pinto dance classes (me dancing?Oh yeah..)
• wanna listen to Thirsty Merc's My Completeness
• want TIRAMISU really really bad
• wish the River Festival is tomorrow
• wanna be in a band and play drums
• need to be more sensible towards the jokes of other people(eventhough they're not funny)
• really wanna go to Three Monkeys and Kylie Minogue's concert
• need to have Boost Juice's King William's Chocolate
• wanna learn kickboxing
• want shoes,shoes,shoes,shoes,shoes and more shoes
• want to design my own wedding gown
• need to learn to control unwanted silly facial expressions
• wish I could turn back time and play Faris Daniel for Drama Blok more properly(me acting? Ooooh yeah..)
• am obviously bored(or in a state of denial.You do have A LOT OF WORK waiting to be done,you know..) and it's only the first day of Easter Break.

things do get worse when you think they just couldn't get any worse and things do get better when you think they just couldn't get any better..

1) It was always stressful 2 or 3 days before my meeting with my beloved supervisor.I have to prepare myself with questions,ideas,suggestions and worse, my progress of the week.It's not that he put pressure on me.He's very supportive,flexible,lenient,helpful,funny and not to mention classically good-looking (he's from Greek background.Whoppa!). I was really stressed out today before our meeeting coz my research this week was kinda going nowhere.I was really really lost.I was ready to reschedule my meeting.Ntah camne ntah,I just went for the meeting feeling so unprepared and nervous.Luckily,it turned out ok.Better than ok actually.Got heaps of useful stuff for my thesis esp on how to develop my Visualization Tests.Plus,I got extra help from another Lecturer who offered to help me with the movies.Yey!


2) My mom accident kene langgar Kembara while she was riding her motorbike.It happened somewhere near KLCC.Alhamdulillah the injuries weren't so serious(according to my Mom la but I really think it was serious.Her knees koyak teruk..) and she's recovering. It happened last Friday.I just knew about it yesterday.Why? Coz when I called home last Sunday,the entire family didn't say anything about the accident and in fact everyone sounded happy and fine.Semuanye adelah kerane tidak mahu anaknye ini risau. Padahal at that time she wasn’t in a good condition. I was sooo shocked when I finally knew about it.Cam nak nangis ade(nangis dah pun),gelabah,cuak,gabra,risau,cam nak balik Mesia jam tu jugak dll..But everything’s fine now.Syukur sangat2.....

no title

My sister will undergo her operation this Thursday. I called mom last Sunday. She told my sister is doing ok despite the fact she will undergo an operation to remove a lump in her breast. We first knew about it when she went for a medical check-up utk that PKN thing.They found out there was a lump. So, they told us to wait coz they need to do like, a further diagnosis to know whether its just a lump or more serious than that. We waited for them to call. Kesian sangat my sister. She freaked out and cried when the doctor told her about the lump. But then, who wouldn’t? Simply being a woman puts any female at risk of breast cancer. Lagi-lagi at the age of 18. Absolutely terrifying. Plus the anxiety of getting her SPM result lagi at that time. Bertambah-tambah takut and stress la die..Alhamdulillah..The result of the diagnosis confirmed that the lump has got nothing to do with breast cancer. But still, it must be removed to prevent any further discomfort.

Hang in there!!

Self reminder: Must call sister before the operation. Must. Must. Must. Please do not forget.

mission accomplished!

me and salwas hot n troppo pancake
aiza n dilas Strawberry punch pancake
fazzs yummy Nachos
aizas wedges with sweet chilli and sour cream
fazzs iced chocolate

= happy,happy,happy,happy,happy,happy,happy..tralalalalalalalalalala..

only if u can see the wide grin on my happy face, then you know how important the eating spree is at Pancake Manor's yesterday

aaahh..still couldnt wipe that grin off my face today =)

PQSA Dinner

We had dinner with the Petronas VIPs last nite at Innes Room. It was nice. Been there before for Bruneian Nite so I kinda know what to expect in terms of the food and the setting. I LOVE the PowerPoint presentation by Dollah and Huda. With <Standing In The Eyes OF The World> as the background music, descriptive pictures, sufficient information, ade video clips lagi..To my amazement, the overall outcome was excellent. Technically, it was really really interactive and this is even more highlighted by the fact that no fancy programs were used to produce the presentation. Just PowerPoint. Simple. Well done guys!!

And then, I talked to Mr.Aziz regarding my March allowance yang tak masuk2 lagi. And he simply told me that :Maybe awak tak hantar surat lagi kot:Surat pekebende lak nih. Aku pun tanye dengan muka yg sgt2 blur :Surat ape En.Aziz?: :Justification letter for your results last sem and a study plan. Awak tak hantar lagi, sebab tu allowance tak masuk lagi: Waaah..Aku takyah hantar la justification letter tuh. Aku tak fail maa. In front of quite a number of people lak tuh. Chett! Malu la nih..:Tapi saye memang sure yang saye tak perlu hantar ape2 surat based on results saye arituh.Confirm En.Aziz:Dengan sengih2 kambing nye, he told me that he will look into this matter ngan Azree. Duhh..Apparaa..

Anyways, I would really like to think that last nite event was a success even though there were minor flaws here and there. But then, normal la tuh..Nothing’s perfect.. And again, congratulations to everyone who was involved. Your effort was definitely worthwhile.Hopefully someone will upload the pictures a.s.a.p..

what i really really want right now is..

any pancake with ice cream plus choc sauce and banana

and also Oreo..

di atas normal - peter pan

pikiranku

tak dapat ku mengerti

kaki di kepala

kepala di kaki

pikiranku

patutnya menyadari

siapa yang harus

dan tak harus ku cari

tetapi tak dapat ku mengerti

sesuatu

yang harus ku sadari

kau tinggalkanku

tanpa sebab yang pasti

sesuatu yang harusnya terjadi

kau sakiti aku

kau yang harus ku benci

tetapi tak dapat ku mengerti

tetapi tak dapat ku mengerti

ku mencari sesuatu yang telah pergi

ku mencari hati yang ku benci

ku mencari sesuatu yang tak kembali

ku mencari hati yang ku benci

ku mencari tetap tak dapat ku temui

ku mencari hati yang ku benci

In red,relevant,yang lain takde kene mengene.Suke bangat lagu ni!

Let go of any hatred you have because anger makes you age

I will have to agree with it. I am disappointed right now that I am angry. And I am afraid that it will turn into intense dislike and I hate myself for being in this state. Hatred and anger are like a time bomb. Given a time limit, it will keep ticking and when the time comes, it will go off. As hatred and anger are slowly being built up inside you, there will be many possible obstructive consequences that you might see. Mentally exhausted, vengeance, bitching, backstabbing, cattiness, rumours spreading and loads more. The outcome? Faster aging and a depressing life. And one day when you cannot hold it back any longer, you will explode just like a volcano.

But sometimes, you just cannot help from hating someone at his or her first sight. Or being annoyed with tiny-little-baby-hiccups matters. Or even worse, you cant even recall the reason you are infuriated in the first place. So, why am I angry in the first place? I am not sure. Maybe I have expectations that are not being met and questions that are not answered that led me feeling uncertain about things. If only I know all the answers, things will be so much easier. Can save myself from aging quickly and stay a bit younger.

You put one foot in the future and one foot in the past, you will shit on the present.

24 February 20045

back to school

I am back in Brisbane.
Back to uni.
Back to gruelling hours in the labs.
Back to an apparent life of sharing.
Back to walking and public transportation.
Back to one whole year full of promising challenges in which I hope I will successfully endure.

And I will terribly miss my time in Petrosains and all the wonderful people that I met there.
Especially K.Anina, Laila, Farah, Firdaus, Taufiq, Zam, Lynn, Sue, Hani, Farhad,Hadi and many others who had helped and guided me and of course for the friendships that they offered. [Rase cam nak nangis] Keep in touch!!

25 January 2005

daily dirts part ii

uish..dah berabuk gler blog nih..Daily? I cant even call it weekly coz my last entry was like, 12 days ago?..Just for the sake of naming this entry. Nampak cam sequel sket.12 days had passed and I am still a Petrosains volunteer,who works from 9 to 6-ish almost everyday,trying to recall all the basic science concepts that I used to learn in high school so that I can entertain the visitors.Nevertheless, quite a number of things happened within the past 12 days.

• Someone went to Sabah for a week last Sunday.
• I got a very very pleasant surprise from a friend: a very very pretty pair of open-toe-very-the-retro heels which I had my eyes on for weeks.
• I went to watch a soccer match between Petrosains and StagnoTECH team, and surprisingly found myself enjoying it waaay better than the final game Kedah vs. Perlis..
• I missed out on the chance of hanging out with my Brisbane friends(and Melbourne) and I felt really really bad about it.
• I saw Anuar Zain at KLCC one day after I finished work :)
• My sister went to the Petrosains Volunteer interview,succeded, and will start her training tomorrow.
• Most of my UTP friends had their last day at Petrosains last Thursday as they will start uni soon.Each and everyone of you will be missed very very much for different reasons: Mujtahid (your funky glasses will never be forgotten!), Fatihah (an inspiring geologist with a very very cool Mona Lisa's Smile's haircut.KIMAH,I wish you were here to see it for yourself.Pastuh,bleh geng!), Zhaf (the tallest and bubliest and also the most selambe.U rawk!), Adi Akmal(a walking, living proof that cute things come in small packages.Heh..),Firdaus(among the first person that I knew there.Rakan se'The Aviator' and rakan seperlepakan after work)
• There were also some international UTP students who were there to do their coursework.Had the chance to know them better sampai bleh main2 hit my head with a basketball and poked me (in the head,again) with gulung2an kertas mahjong presentation mereka sekali dalam 20 minit. Anuchit, you will definitely not be forgotten! Wish u all the best in UTP!
• Spider won AJL 19. Yey!!!
  
  

13 January 2005

daily dirts part 1

There was a station called Diorama in Petrosains.And there was an exhibit on volcanoes and earthquakes.Since the tsunami that day,Diorama has become quite the centre of attention.Many visitors were very enthusiastic to learn more about the science behind tsunami.I was stationed at Diorama today together with Farhad,the bubbly-ultimately crazy-UTP-student.Terhibur sket ngan anak kacukan Iran nih.Heh.Every 1/2 hour yg takde visitors he'd start singing the BM translated version of Britney Spears' songs.Gila.Tapi best!Heh..
One major blackout this afternoon.Petrosains was affected jugak.Since there was no electricity,the staffs were allowed to go out for lunch til everything was back to normal again.Best arini.Kurang visitors.Kurang kerja.Extra lunch hour.Tau2 je it was time to go home.Yey! Looking forward to tomorrow.

P/S: Just bought myself a pair of a very pink and retro mules and a pair of a very funky,so-old-school sneakers.Yippie!!